Monday, August 4, 2008

Confusion's the order of the day

My head seems to be so full nowadays!! I seem to be living in a limbo, with my thoughts touching on everything in a haphazard way!! Confusion seems to be the order of the day and I seem to be walking around in a daze too!!

What has brought on all this turmoil?? To be quite honest, I have no idea!! I suppose it's just one of 'those days' where I find myself thinking about life in general. Where I'm heading, what are my goals and what am I doing to achieve them?? These are the thoughts running through my mind recently. Could this be the reason for my confusion?? Am I doing what's needed to make progress?? On closer examination I have achieved many things but then why do I feel so unfulfilled and disorientated??

Yesterday I found myself dawdling around the house and although I had a birthday cake to finish for a 3 year old, I took my own time getting it done!! I normally take an hour to finish the decoration and so forth but it took me 2 hours to finish!! When I had finished the cake, I sat in the sun reading a book, which allowed my brain to focus on one task. But not for long though, my spirit felt uneasy so I put the book down and did something else.

I don't like feeling this way, it's such an out of control mode it scares me to bits!! God help me, I need to find some peace soon!!

1 comment:

Smooches said...

Salaam my sweet!

You know i had an experience this weekend... and one which certainly opened up my eyes. We spend so much time trying to get 'where we want to be'. Is it all worth it in the end? When we do reach our intended goal and alas! embrace the achievement... isn't it fast filled with another? It's a continuing cycle! When will it ever end? Because we busy ourselves with all these mundane tasks, do we ever just sit back and appreciate that where we are right now is exactly where we're meant to be, that we have achieved success beyond measure to just be here, to experience life and to be thankful for your cognisance and five senses. I too am very much like you and am slowly learning… the road of life is filled with many emotions, some we need to embrace… and some we need to get rid of fast… for once we let negative emotions seed, they fast bloom. Seed only the positive my cousin and your life will be enriched with love, blessings and great achievement! I love you!

Shaheema xxx