Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Mother's Day

I have been so late to do this post, with my attention being elsewhere I just haven't had the time to do so. Most of my time has been spent attending interviews & stressing about the call backs and making it onto the shortlist. But Alghumdulillah, all is well that ends well.

Mother's day was such a riot, with the ladies in the family gathering for brekkie at Nino's Kenilworth. There was a bit of miscommunication but fortunately everything was sorted by the time it was time to leave for the location. All the cousins had a great time and so did their mums.

The beautiful view from Nino's

Shaheema, Nadia, Raihaana & I

We also visited a close family friend, Aunty Marel, who is currently under Idah. Her husband had passed on a few weeks ago. She normally attends all the family functions and helps in many ways, a reason why my mum & aunts see her as part of the family. An additional sister, so to speak. Since she couldn't attend the breakfast, they decided to go & exchange gifts at her home. I thought that it was a very nice gesture.

My mum & I at Aunty Marel's home

I am blessed in many ways, one of them being that I have 2 mothers to celebrate Mother's day with. Unfortunately for me, my stepmother lives in JHB which means I only get to see her when they visit. And that is coming June. YAY!! Who knows, perhaps I'll be able celebrate Father's day with both my dads being present!! Now that's something definitely worth looking forward to!!

My gran was sorely missed but my mum & aunts regaled in many stories about her, which made it easier for them. My late gran was such a strong woman, I was completely awestruck by her strength. The one thing that stays with me about her, is that she never complained while she was sick. She always had a smile on her face & her face lit up when her children, grandchildren & great-grandchildren visited her. Even when her health deteriorated she became upset if we visited without our children.

During Ramadaan, every weekend some of the grandchildren would go and break fast with her. Although not fasting herself, she'd enquire about the goodies that were made. One just had to tell her Shahieda made this, or Shahieda made that and she would want some. Not that she could eat it though, her diet then had consisted mainly of liquids. But just the knowledge that in some way she was partaking gave her some peace.

On one occasion, I had made some fancies and snowballs for Sunday afternoon tea. When Nadia fetched me, I decided not to go. You see, her condition was getting to me. I had always known her as this amazing woman of strength and to see her deteriorate the way she did made me very emotional. I didn't want to cry in front of her, so I'd often sneak to the bathroom & do my crying there. Nadia & her kids went on their own instead, taking along the fancies & snowballs.

Nadia told me afterwards, that Ma had seen everyone eating the little cakes & the look of longing on her face said it all!! To alleviate her suffering, Nadia told her seeing that she couldn't eat them perhaps just a little lick of the cream would take away her desire to have some?? Ma did just that and it was then that we all realized how we take everyday chores for granted. The ability to eat something without having to think of the consequences became a hazardous action for her.

After my divorce, she encouraged me in every way possible. And scolded when my health and well being was not my top priority. Her last words to me will always resonate to my core, "I am proud of the strong, beautiful woman you have become. Keep it up." This she said with a thumbs up, hehehe!! This time, I ended up crying in front of her but was firmly told that I shouldn't because she was ok, she was at peace.

May Allah illuminate your kabr with Noor, and may He grant you Jannatul - Firdous Ameen!! This duah is extended to all those who have lost the one we call Mother, may Allah ease your pain & make the grieving process a bit easier.



Shaheema said...

your post is beautiful! i sit here with tears in my eyes!

May Allah grant all deceased Jannah-tul Firdous, Insha-Allah, Ameen!

Shahieda said...

Thank you couz!! I was in tears while writing the post too, I do miss her very much.

Ameen, Ameen, Ya Rabbal Alameen!!