Nipping it in the bud

Last night after having had supper I suddenly had this sad feeling envelope me. It happens every now and then. It's of no use me going on as if nothing was wrong, I had to acknowledge what I was feeling. So I just allowed it to be and cried so that I could get it out of my system!!

There I was all alone on the couch bawling my eyes out, but I sure felt better when I was done. Loneliness does have a way of creeping up on you. I'm a very, no fiercely, independent person and I'm happy with my circumstances and my life as it is but I miss coming home to someone special. What I miss the most though is 'spooning'. The process of fitting your torso into the back of the person sleeping next to you. Oh what I wouldn't give to just be able to do that again!!

This actually had me thinking how I was going to make a long distance relationship work. It's the first time I'm trying this and I don't know how to go about doing so. LOL!! Sounds silly but true. What if he doesn't feel the way I do?? What if this doesn't work?? No, no!! No negative thinking just leave the "what ifs" for now!!

There are times when I visit friends who are in relationships and I listen to them moan and groan about petty things. They know better than to ask my opinion because my answer will always be that they should be grateful that they have someone to share their lives with. That they should be grateful to have someone to confide in, to shout at, to dance with, to play with, to laugh with but most importantly to just be yourself with!!

If you have someone special in your life take full advantage of the time you have together. Laugh more, dance more, sing more and just allow each other to grow. Take it from me, you will only realise when you don't have it what you're missing out on.

After I was done sulking and crying I listened to a Celine Dion cd. There is just something about her music, lyrics and her amazing voice that allows me to centre myself once more. There's one particular track that I love, and it doesn't matter how many times I listen to it, it moves me every single time. The track is called "The Color of my Love" and I'll leave you with the lyrics of this song to ponder on. I think it will resonate with you as much as it does with me. For the time being I'll just 'paint' that special person into my life!!

I'll paint my moon in shades of blue

Paint my soul to be with you

I'll sketch your limbs in shaded tones

Draw your mouth to my own

I'll draw your arms around my waist

Then all doubt I shall erase

I'll paint the rain that softly lands on your window in May

I'll trace a hand to wipe your tears

Gently calm your fears

A silhouette of dark and light

While we hold each other, oh so tight

I'll paint a star to warm your heart

Swearing that we'll never part

That's the color of my love

I'll paint the truth show how I feel

Try to make you completely real

I'll use a brush so light and fine

To draw you close and make you mine

I'll paint a star to warm your heart

Swearing that we'll never, ever part

That's the color of my love

I'll paint the years are passing by

So much to learn, so much to try

And with this ring our life will start

Swearing that we'll never part

I offer what you cannot buy

Devoted love, until we die