I have a confession to make......

I probably should have mentioned this earlier, but I suppose now is as good a time as any. I have an addiction. *And it's bad!!*

I need my fix early morning, although when I'm not able to get it I have it later during the day.

But have it I must.

I've tried hard to get my body to function without it but the withdrawal symptoms are just horrendous!!

One day without it and my brain doesn't even function properly too, my thoughts continuously return to it.

The doctor says it's good for me and that I shouldn't even try to give it up. I suppose he's right.

Fruit salad, my addiction!!

What were you thinking???? Haaaiiiibbbbooo, you must neva!!! :)

India se 9/11.....

That was the headline that greeted me this morning while on my way to work!!!



I am deeply disturbed & saddened by the fact that humans kill in the name of religion. All religions preach peace & the sanctity of life. For too long have I sat back & watched atrocities being performed in the name of Islam without voicing my opinion. Today, my silence ends.......




Islam has, & always will be a religion of peace & has preached an atittude of non-violence since it's revelation. Our Prophet (SAW) was a peace loving man & would only take up arms when he or his people were threatened. One just needs to read up on how he handled the situation with the Christians of Najraan, a city in Yemen 1360 years ago. The Holy Quran preaches non violence too & the maxim that a human is innocent until proven guilty.



These militant 'Islamists' who go around killing innocent people in the name of Allah & calling it Jihaad are twisting verses from the Quran to their end. There is no verse in the Quran that condones such senseless acts.



Many non Muslims have the perception that Jihaad means 'war'. Jihaad means struggle or difficulty. That is, any struggle or difficulty that you may encounter on your journey through life. So, I do not understand where the concept of Jihaad meaning 'war' stems from & why, when mentioned brings fear & images of violence to mind!!


Recently I happened to watch the movie 'Body of lies', starring Leonardo Dicaprio & Russell Crowe. Let me just say that if what was portrayed here is what really happens if these militant groups go about their 'duties', then I'm in need of a wake up call!!


The only way to remove these perceptions is to educate those around us. Islam is a most beautiful religion & if we would take the time to read up on all the facets of it, we would realise how complete it is!! Hopefully my post today will help in some small significant way. I've always believed that the pen is mightier than the sword, may Allah guide & protect us all Insha-Allah Ameen!!

The person responsible............

for my frustration at work will be going on leave for the next three weeks. YAY!! I'm ecstatic. Can you tell???

I've decided that during the time he is away from the office I'll be able to put procedures in place that would allow for smoother running of the accounting side of the company. Lets just hope that when he returns, he's going to adhere to procedure.

Since working here my days are filled with trying to explain why a paper trail from an accounting perspective is very important. Shucks, the sales staff don't even make out a receipt for cash received. HUH?? Where have you ever heard that??

The C.O.D account is in the 120 day outstanding mark already & trying to get contact information from him for the specific customers is like trying to draw water from a rock!! CASH.ON.DELIVERY. That's what it's supposed to mean, I think the dictionary he uses probably has it listed as meaning something else, hehehe.

Nonetheless, I look forward to the peace & quiet of the next three weeks. No shouting, no smoking in the warehouse, no cussing & certainly no temper tantrums!! I'll probably have to pinch myself every now & again to remind myself I'm not dreaming!! LOL!!

Shucks, I could definitely get used to him not being around at all. But that, my friends, would be wishful thinking on my part!!

It's strange how children tend to air their fears.

Last night while cleaning up my kitchen, Uthmaan confessed that he was very frustrated. A 11 year old, frustrated??

I stopped what I was doing & gave him my full attention. What he told me completely blew me away to say the least!!

The following is the conversation that ensued:

Uthmaan: Mom, I need to tell you something. But you have to take this very seriously, ok.

Me (totally taken aback): I take everything you say seriously, my dear!!

Uthmaan (wearing a very somber expression): Ok, I need a brother in this house!! Being the only boy is driving me crazy!!

Me (stifling a grin): I completely understand my boy!! I'd feel the same way if I were in your shoes. But you do realise what it means for this to happen??

Uthmaan: Yes mum, it means you need to get married. I want you to but I need to feel comfortable with that person first.

Me(comforting him): There's no way I would even consider marrying someone if my children weren't happy with him.

Uthmaan(sighing): I know that mum, you say that all the time. But it's time for you to settle down now, you've been on your own too long.

Me(thinking how quickly he's grown up): I need to find someone suitable first, not so?? In this day & age it's kinda difficult. So just be patient & make dua for me, ok.

Uthmaan: Yes, I don't want someone who's going to hurt you or someone who won't accept us. You're always in my duas mum & remember that I love you!!

Me: I love you too sweets!!

When I had put my children to bed, I realised that Uthmaan's fears were brought on by the episode of Sewende Laan he had watched earlier. Errol's mom has a boyfriend who physically abuses her, she has such a low self esteem that she doesn't realise what it's doing to herself & her son.

He's also picked up on my aloof mood of late. I've always been one to not let anything dampen my spirits. But lately it's been difficult because of various things taking place. There's my loneliness for one (it's quite overwhelming at times), Raihaana's trip to the doctor again & the one year anniversary of my gran who passed away from lung cancer.

Uthmaan's conversation made me realise that I need to be more weary of how I go about dealing with my feelings. Yes, I'm only human but the conversation was certainly a wake up call!!

So, this is how my children keep me grounded!! And like I said yesterday when I commented on Nazrah's note, my children are certainly the light at the end of the tunnel!!

Happy Birthday to me!!

Yep, I've just turned 35 years old (read: 21) & I am utterly grateful for my circumstances Alghumdulillah!!

Firstly, I would like to thank my Creator for the blessings in my life, I definitely wouldn't be where I am today without His Ragmah.

They say that the older we become the wiser we are. Wiser, perhaps but I'm still one who can be whimsical, crazy & foolish at the same time, hehehe. But I wouldn't change that for the world!! It's this whimsical & foolish nature that made me celebrate my birthday at the Capetonian Hotel with family members. What was so whimsical or foolish about that?? Well, I asked all my guests to dress up big time!! So, it ended up looking more like a Debutant Ball, hehehe.

Suffice to say that I ended up being fashionably late (read: I wanted to make an entrance).

The food was scrumptious, the company vibey & fun. I only missed one person.......... (sigh)

To crown it all, Gakiema had surprised me with a birthday cake, candles & all!! She can be as crazy & foolish as I am. I don't see how otherwise, as we're both Scorpios, celebrating our birthdays days from each other!! Shukran sweets, you made my day & I didn't even see it coming!! LOL!!

A great, big Shukran to Shaheema for making the most beautiful dress!! And for always reminding me that 'I am beautiful in every single way, words can't bring me down.' Love you lots like jelly tots!!

To all my family & friends, I cannot thank you enough for your sms', emails & phone calls!! Your well wishes & duas are greatly appreciated!! Without your love & support I would not be able to weather the many storms life has thrown my way. I cannot see a life without any one of you!! May Allah bless each one of you & may we still be together & continue to grow for a long time to come Insha-Allah Ameen!!

An Idyllic weekend

To say that my weekend away was great, is a gross understatement!! It was definitely what the doctor ordered and what I needed to get myself centered once again.

One needs to get away from the hustle & bustle of city life every now & again. What better place to do so than Club Mykonos on the West Coast. It was my first time there & I'm definitely visiting Mykonos again in the near future, Insha-Allah.

On arriving there, the first thing I noticed was that the whole setup looked exactly like Mykonos in Greece!! If you've seen the movie Mama Mia, you'll know what I'm talking about. Quaint little chalets painted in primary colors, cobbled paths as well as windmills!! Even the details on the harbor are similar.

By the time we had checked in I was ravenous!! We had decided on something quick for supper, which was borewors rolls with accompanying sauces.

We hardly had any sleep Friday evening, mind you!! All the ladies were far too busy talking about everything under the sun. I managed to get some shut eye around 5am Saturday morning, hehehehe. I probably had about 3 hours sleep,when I woke up to the smell of breakfast being made downstairs!! Yummy!! Debbie had jumped the gun & was busy making omelettes with viennas & cheese.

* I know you're reading this Sedick, so I purposefully put in pics of the food!! Hungry?? hehehe*

After the delish breafkfast we decided to explore a bit. Shiehaam & Debbie had been to Mykonos before so they were the guides, showing us the sights & sounds. There was a tiny fleamarket which we spotted & upon browsing around I discovered a beautiful wrought iron stand with glass bowl. The bowl had holes around the circumference, allowing for serviettes to be pushed through.



We then made our way to the harbour and then the beach. I'd been waiting for such a long time to take a stroll on the beach. Normally when I'm stressed I would either bake up a storm in the kitchen, dance till I was completely out of breath, clean my home from top to bottom or do some embroidery. When all else fails, I'd hit the beach and take in the rythmic sound of the waves. I haven't done it in a looooooonnnggg time.










I certainly walked away feeling rejuvenated & I felt like the cowebs in my mind had been cleared. By the time we returned to the chalet we were famished once again. For lunch we just finished what was left of breakfast & snacked on some chips, crackers with gourmet cheese & so forth. After lunch it was time for dancing!! YAY!! Shiehaam had brought along a cd with some of Mama Mia's sound track songs, so Cindy & I just let loose!! The two of us danced till we were completely out of breath!! Then it was Aneesa's turn to get her groove on. And did she dance Sedick, I know I'm rubbing it in!!



Out of breath & a couple of kilos lighter, preparation was made for supper *we really ate too much.* Braaied chicken, sausage & chops were the order of the day, as well as noodle salad, potato salad & a tossed salad. And no Sedick, we did not burn the meat AND we did not require any help from the neighbours (read: a man) to get the fire going!! Hehehehe!!



After stuffing our faces we relaxed a bit & then I went upstairs to take in the beautiful sunset.

Then it was time for our session in the pools & the sauna. I'm not one to swim when there are alot of people around. So I was quite chuffed when we arrived there & the pools weren't too full. The warm water was quite soothing!!




Thereafter we ended up in the sauna for about half an hour. When all the ladies had finished showered, we went back to the chalet where a huge pampering session ensued!! Debbie gave each lady a massage, making my toes curl!! Thank you Debs, it was much appreciated!! We ended up getting to bed in the wee hours of Sunday morning!!



It was my turn to make breakfast & yes, I did say I wasn't going to do any cooking for the weekend. But had I not made my choc-chip pancakes or chocolate mousse for dessert, I would have had to walk home!! LOL!!

After breafast it was time for some serious shopping!! The children wouldn't be very impressed with mum if she returned home without bearing any gifts,*wink, wink*

We returned to the Lagoon Mall to scout for gifts. Shiehaam & I went into a curio shop we spotted Friday evening already. They were selling the most beautiful trinkets. What was very surprising to me was that they were stockists of Carrol Boyes products. According to Theo, an email buddy, these products were only found at exclusive shops but then again Langebaan is a tourist attraction.

We all managed to find gifts for the little ones eagerly waiting for mum to come home. After having our lunch & dessert (bugger, I had forgotten to take pics of Sunday lunch, those pics would have been too much for you to handle Sedick!! hehehe) we reflected amongst ourselves about the past 2 days spent together. Saying our thanks to each other & expressing gratitude for the spritual growth that we afforded one another too!!





*And a unanimous decision was made to return to Mykonos but with the families as well*

YAY!!! The weekend's here!!

I've been looking forward to this weekend since Ramadaan month!! Yes, this weekend I get to go away & chill with a few girlfriends.

It will be the first time ever that I am away from my kids (they get to spend weekends away from me, if you know what I mean, hehehe). But it's a well deserved break, something I should have done a long time ago. Two days before Eid I had a wake up call in the form of an anxiety or asthma attack (I'm not asthmatic)!! That experience I will never forget. I suppose it was my body's way of telling me to slow down.

But what made it even worse was the fact that the attack happened in full view of my children!! The helplessness they felt and the fear in their eyes was heart wrenching!! I've been so used to doing everything for the last 7 years *(Uthmaan calls me 'superwoman')* that I had taken my health for granted.

I suppose I can't blame myself too, being the eldest I was reared to be strong at all times. So it's been a pattern of mine for years, just pushing myself and making no excuses at all. Well, today I'm making an excuse, from 14h30 today till 18h30 on Sunday I shall be doing absolutely nothing but relaxing!! No baking, no cooking, no cleaning, just reading, walking on the beach & having a great time with the ladies!!

*Club Mykonos here I come*